


A Conversation

by cupcakekillian



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/M, i love cisco ramon, i love iris west, iris is working through some shit, sunshine twins, they both love barry allen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-09
Updated: 2017-10-09
Packaged: 2019-01-15 10:40:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12319368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cupcakekillian/pseuds/cupcakekillian
Summary: "I realized that it was deeper, that there was something else. That’s when I realized that I was mad at him. I was mad at the Speed Force for taking him and I was mad at him for letting it.”contains spoilers for The Flash Season 4.





	A Conversation

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on tumblr: @emmaspirate

_The Flash Saves Twelve From Apartment Fire_

 

It was a good article, both in structure and content. It had a hopeful tone to it, one that suggested that there was nothing to worry about because The Flash was back. He would protect them. He would always protect Central City. 

 

It was all wrong.

 

Of course, the only people who knew that it was all a big fat lie were Cisco, Wally, Joe, and her. She hadn’t wanted to write the article, but they’d all talked her into it. Wally was taking up The Flash mantle, a move that she knew he felt intensely guilty about, but they needed her to really sell it. When she’d sat down and began typing she felt as though she were betraying the people of Central City. They knew she had a connection to The Flash, they trusted that whatever she was saying about him was the truth. So she lied, and after she’d turned it into her editor and he’d commended her on her work she’d cried in a bathroom stall. She was pretty sure someone had come in and heard her, but she was also certain they’d chock it up to her fiancé’s disappearance. She had obviously told the office the bare minimum about Barry’s absence and they’d all offered their condolences and then no one spoke of it again. Her work hadn’t been affected in the slightest, quite the contrary in fact, but she’d become much harder and her coworkers tended to avoid her. 

 

It had been six months since he’d disappeared and despite appearances she wasn’t doing any better. 

 

“Iris? Earth to Iris?” 

 

Her head snapped up as he called her name and she did her best to pretend that she’d been listening. “Sorry, what?” 

 

Cisco rolled his eyes not in annoyance but frustration. “What do you think of the plan?” 

 

Truth be told she’d only heard bits and pieces of yet another way to get Barry out of the Speed Force. Iris knew that he only ran them by her anymore out of respect since most of the science went over her head. She had become the de facto decision maker, and she had proven very good at the task, but these discussions grated on her. “It sounds like just as good a plan as any other.” She didn’t dare bring up how all the other plans had failed, but she knew Cisco filled in the blank.

 

“So you’re in? You’ll help?” 

 

Iris leaned back against the desk she’d been standing next to and crossed her arms. “I don’t know Cisco there’s so much that needs to be done. I’m sure you can handle it.” 

 

Even though he had to be used to her turning him down, he still looked surprised. “So you don’t want to help?” 

 

“Of course I want to help, I just think my time can be put to better use elsewhere,” She murmured unconvincingly. 

 

Cisco shifted in his chair, eyebrows furrowing. “Really? Cause you haven’t helped try and get Barry out of the Speed Force since our first attempt.” 

 

Iris shrugged, doing her best to remain nonchalant. “I’ve been busy.” 

 

If she had to find a silver lining to Barry’s disappearance, it would be the fact that she and Cisco had grown extremely close. Grief had a way of doing that she supposed. He had become her shoulder to cry on, and he was fiercely protective of her which she suspected was because he felt he owed it to Barry. She in turn had filled the hole that Barry had left in whatever way she could. She’d become a listening ear, a best friend, and, in her own way, someone Cisco looked up to. They knew each other so well it was frightening at times.

 

So of course he saw right through her. 

 

“Iris, you of all people, how can you not be in on this?” He paused then, seeming as though he needed to gather the courage to challenge her. “It’s almost like you don’t care if he comes out.” 

 

The accusation pulsed through her body like an electric shock. She knew there was no malice behind his words, he was just trying to understand, but the anger rose up anyways. “Of course I care if Barry comes out. I can’t believe you’d even suggest otherwise.” 

 

Cisco held up his hands in deference. “Okay, okay, then just tell me what it is.” 

 

“I want Barry out of the Speed Force, I just…” Iris trailed off as she tried to put her feelings into words. 

 

“You just what?” 

 

She figured that maybe Cisco would judge her, maybe he’d even hate her for what she was going to say, but it was better to say it than not to. “I just don’t want him out now,” She blurted out. 

 

For a moment she thought maybe Cisco hadn’t understood her what with the way her words had jumbled together. He had, of course, and he quickly adopted his best poker face. “So, let me see if I’m getting this, you want Barry out of the Speed Force, you just don’t want Barry out of the Speed Force _now_?”

 

Iris hoisted herself up so she was now sitting atop the desk as she tried to collect her thoughts. As she tried to put into words the feelings she’d been struggling to cope with since he’d left. “Everyone keeps looking at me like I should be sad. My dad has been the worst. He keeps telling me that it’s okay to not be okay, because how could I be? I don’t know how to tell him that I’m not okay, but that I’m not sad.” She paused then, tucking a piece of stray hair behind her ear. “I’m mad.” 

 

“You’re mad?” Came the confused reply.

 

Iris huffed. “I’m mad at him. At Barry. At first I thought I was just mad at the Speed Force for just constantly taking things from me. I feel like it keeps targeting me. I mean what are the odds that my fiancé and my brother both end up speedsters?” She paused then. “But then I realized that it was deeper, that there was something else. That’s when I realized that I was mad at him. I was mad at the Speed Force for taking him and I was mad at him for letting it.” 

 

Cisco was clearly trying to understand, but it was evident he was struggling. “He didn’t have any other choice, Iris. He had to pay for Flashpoint.” 

 

Her voice came out an octave higher than it had been as her temper flared. “But he didn’t even think Cisco, he didn’t even try and fight! He just left us, he just left me!” 

 

Cisco sighed. “Iris, you know if he thought that he had any other option he would’ve taken it. You know he would never ever leave you if he thought that he didn’t absolutely have to.” 

 

“But that’s just it. How many times has he had to leave me? First he had to get his powers back and got trapped in the Speed Force. Then he created Flashpoint because he couldn’t handle his grief and I understood that, of course I did. But now there’s this and we know he disappears again in 2024 and how many times am I going to be condemned to this? To waiting until he comes back?”

 

Her friend stood up then, crossing over to her so that he was directly in front of her. “But every time he’s gone away, you’ve been the one to pull him back.”

 

If either of them noticed the tears beginning to run down Iris’ face, they both ignored them. “How long can I keep doing that for? How can I build a future with someone if they aren’t around?” Iris ran the back of her hand against her face, wiping some of the tears away. “He’s always going to be The Flash first, Cisco. That’s one of the reasons I love him. I’m just not sure I can keep forgiving him every time he runs off to save the world and doesn’t even look back to see who he’s leaving behind.” 

 

“You honestly think it doesn’t break him every time he’s separated from you? That he’s not looking back?” Cisco asked, voice dropping to a whisper. 

 

Iris offered him a small, albeit sad, smile. “Of course I don’t think that. I know that me asking him to stay would probably be the only thing in the world that could get him to. I know all of that, and that’s why I don’t want him out of the Speed Force right now. I’m hoping I can work through this anger before he gets back.” 

 

“If you feel this way then Barry should know.” 

 

“I think he’ll have enough on his plate to deal with when he gets out, but when the timing is right he will.” Iris bit her lip, not wanting to delve further into the conversation. She’d had her emotional fill for the day.

 

Cisco patted her knee, sensing the end of the conversation. “Good. Now come on, let’s go get a drink.” 

 

She knew that he was going to get Barry out, but that he wouldn’t be able to do it without her help. She also knew that when push came to shove she’d be ready to give it. 

 

No matter what, Barry would always save the world. 

 

No matter what, Iris would always save Barry. 


End file.
